"THE TRAIN STOP" [part 1]

(One year after I said my final goodbye to the person I'd grown to love.)

"Each departing train carried a piece of my love, leaving you stranded on the platform of memories."

The past few months haven't been easy for any of us. I've been thinking about the possible future of this relationship, and as I look at it, I understand that I don't want us to get stuck in that cycle. So, while it's still early, I have to drop you off and wave my hands in gratitude for everything that you've done.

I never expected to have this experience at my age, nor would it have been so easy for me to choose to sacrifice my comfort for your happiness. It was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to connect deeply with someone. That is why, regardless of how it ended, I will never regret all of my efforts because I know I was happy.

Now, we are at the train stop. The place where we normally meet to spend our weekends together. This time, however, things are different, because this is where we'll say our final goodbyes. I've attempted to explain my reasons as best as I could without blaming anyone.

I carefully chose the right words to speak, as casually as possible. To be honest, I expected you to ask for another chance, as you always did. But no. You did not. Instead, I noticed how you attempted to keep your tears from falling as you digested each word that I uttered. Perhaps you anticipate this would happen, and you simply want to prove to yourself that you are capable of dealing with the situation. You did it, actually. I commend you for that.

And with that. I turned my back and began to walk away, but in a split second, I turned and gave you my final hug. It is an embrace of apologies and gratitude. I stared into your eyes and saw you still holding back the tears as you said, "Glad you came back." I'm not sure what you mean by that. All I'm thinking about is telling you how much I cherish our relationship.

The day progressed, and I still wondered if I had done the right thing. Questions flooded my thoughts, telling me:

"Did I make the stupidest mistake in letting go of the only person who truly fell in love with me?"

"Did I make a decision without thinking things through?"

"If you really love him, wasn't it reasonable to give the relationship another chance?"

But no matter how hard those thoughts pounded in my head, I'd already done what I did, and there's no going back now. That night, you left me a message. There were expressions of hope. Words of understanding and affection. You chose to understand, just like you had before, even though you had no idea what was going on. You said you'd hold on. You say you'll wait till you find the person you chose to love from the start and that we can still work things out. A promise that didn't last long.

[to be continued...]